Do vampires poop?

People are obsessed with all things vampires, and for some reason, based on the questions we get, one of the many things people want to know about vampires is “do vampires poop?” While this is a rather indelicate topic, it does pose some rather interesting thought-provoking consideration.

The answer is – whether or not a vampire poops depends on the type of vampire.

do vampires poop

Traditional “undead” vampires do not poop. The reason for this is that these vampires are considered “undead”, in other words, their bodies are no longer alive. Their hearts no longer beat. Their hair no longer grows. Their intestines no longer process food. They do subsist and survive on blood, however their bodies do not function the way normal human bodies function. The blood they consume is immediately and entirely absorbed by their undead bodies. There is no unabsorbed liquid left to travel further through the bowels and become poop…as a result, vampires don’t have to or need to poop!

Now, there are other types of vampires… which are vampires that are not undead – but somewhere in-between. They are more human than vampire. These types of vampires are often the “younger” or “newer” vampires. These types of vampires are not necessarily “undead” and still have functioning human bodies. As a result they may require and or their bodies may accept food in addition to the vampiric craving for blood. These types of vampires do indeed poop.


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