restless

It’s 10:30pm and I feel restless. I’ve tried to sleep but sleep eludes me. This seems to be happening to me more and more recently. At first I thought it must be something I’m doing – something that I was eating that was keeping me up, something that was on my mind that was bothering me, something that was distracting me that I didn’t realize, but more and more I’m starting to think it’s something else. Things just feel different somehow.  And not just at night.

During the daytime I find myself wanting to be outside more and more.  I live in a city, and I’ve never found a reason to want to be out in “nature” the way people in the country might feel. But for some reason, I’m wanting to be outside.  And I even feel jealous of people in the country that can go outside and just walk around a field or a forest or a hilltop.

I’ve found myself listening to the wind when I’m outside.  I feel a connection with the wind.  I’ve never really listened to the wind before… in fact, I didn’t even really know that you could.  But you can.  I’ve found you can hear things you didn’t even know were happening if you listen.  The wind carries in sounds of animals, insects, people.  You can hear things farther away than you think.  For how long have I been ignoring all these sounds?

So I’m laying here right now, unable to sleep.  Thinking about all the things that feel different to me, and wondering if anyone else feels the same.  These different feelings(?) these different instincts(?). Is this what the beginning of a shift feels like?

My thanks to a friend (wanting to stay anonymous) for letting us share his thoughts with you…

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9 Responses

  1. James says:

    hi Leeann sent me here toget help trying to find my true spirit and im looking for darlath or sabrefang

  2. pklett92 says:

    Yo James whats up man. I can help you out if you want. Darlath and Sabrefang haven’t been around in a long time. They either changed their names or left the community. What do you need help with?

  3. James says:

    basically just finding out what spirit i am and then a lil guidence on how to start training with it and ill be set, Seig tried to help me but i am unsure if i am really a panda spirit or if that was my imagination wen i tried to do it the frirst time

  4. knowledge seeker says:

    hey james whats up man havent seen u on in awhile. how are u?

  5. @James: I don’t really go by the name of sabrefang. It is just an email.

  6. @James: The problem you might be having is that you are trying it. Sometimes it isn’t about trying it. Instead it is about doing it. Even than there are times when you should not try it because you are not ready.

    There is no one way to find your spirit but there is a feeling that matters the most when you find it.

  7. James says:

    @Leon i didnt mean i was trying to do it i meant i wanted to try and find help to do it , and i believe im ready to do it and find w/e it is thats inside lol

  8. @James: I understand now :-p. Try it, you will know when it happens. Usually though it is about going halfway and meeting your guide in the middle but in all honesty it is different for everyone. My way may not and probably will not be the most appropriate way for you. Than again I wouldn’t know until you try.

  9. lee ann says:

    YAY! I like it when the things i somewhat plan work out ^^ it happens so rarely ^^

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